Picture this: You are watching a movie, and the character is strict, stiff, and serious. A person who has little to no empathy. They remind you of someone you know, someone you bristle at the thought of, someone you choose to avoid. But what if this person is experiencing burnout and is exhausted? They could benefit from a shoulder to lean on. What if this person is the primary caregiver for a sick relative and does not feel like they can bring that to work with them? They could use a little compassion. Thankfully, in recent years, we’ve started to embrace the importance of mental health and recognize empathy as a skill.
Being human. A kind one.
In business, being emotionally intelligent enough to prioritize kindness has incredible advantages. We are all human. “Duh, OLC,” you might be thinking – but seriously, some folks might need the reminder. Each and every one of us has something going on outside of work. Maybe somebody’s dealing with home repairs from a storm, a baby’s sleep regression, or going through a divorce. Don’t you want your team members to brag about how nice their manager has been to them as they figure out life outside of work? This can look like taking some work off their plate, adjusting to flexible hours, or just simply talking to them about what’s going on. Managers who invest this kind of care into their team build trust and loyal employees, which encourages stronger work performance. In fact, studies show that turnover is 4x less likely when employees have emotionally intelligent managers.
In sales, we always say, “Nobody likes to be sold, but everyone likes to buy.” By adopting kindness into your sales strategy, you build trust, instead of what could come off as self-interested or just looking to meet your quota. When you show compassion by listening with intent and asking deeper questions, you show your client that your top priority is solving their problem and meeting their needs. Aren’t you more likely to buy something your friend endorses versus a random person? This attention to kindness builds lasting relationships that bring customers back again and again and turn them into raving fans who refer you more business.
“You catch more flies with honey” is a common saying that rings true whether you’re calling customer support because your Wi-Fi is down, speaking to a client, or even working with a colleague. Now we’re not advising to be overly nice when people are repeatedly showing up late, coasting by, or being otherwise disrespectful. Whether you are a leader, salesperson, or leading from the middle, there is a way to be professional and still be disciplined with team members.
Options for kindness
- Choosing words calmly and carefully in one-on-one meetings, rather than publicly raising your voice or embarrassing them in front of others. No one wants to be dressed down in public. It’s not a good look for them, or for you.
- Provide constructive feedback and expectations to see real change. Threats and punishments are empty and unproductive. Give clear instructions on how to improve and allow space for them to ask questions, provide examples to them and even offer to teach and role-play.
- Be sure you share what they are doing well. Positive feedback is going to help reinforce the behavior that you want to see from them. We all learned as children through positive reinforcement (remember stickers and gold stars?). Let’s bring back some of that fun praise and positivity.
It’s time to trade in the idea that leadership means being the loudest voice in the room. You don’t have to be stern or strident. Instead, let’s lead with compassion, kindness and warmth. So, go ahead, be bold with your kindness, sprinkle it around like confetti, and while you’re at it, “Grow Big or Go Home!”®